Almost there....*

Well, here's the penultimate square. The colors aren't quite right, and I flipped the two left squares wrong way round, but I refuse to take a fifth picture of this stupid thing.

The final square is currently being sewn together, and though it doesn't look entirely the way I would like it too, it is still pretty cool. I am going to try and bust my ass to get the thing finished before we leave for Germany next Monday, but I think that may be pushing it. I would love to take it with us as the "play time" blankie, although with the boy mobile now, it may be futile. He's everywhere!

Other than that, nothing to report, although I have been glued to the Weather Channel. North Carolina isn't even expected to get much rain from good ol' Katrina, but I am a fabulous weather hypochondriac. Sample freak out: "Are you sure this isn't tornado weather? 'Cause that looks like a funnel cloud to me. Just rain? Are you sure? Was that lightning hitting our house? It wasn't? Then what was it? Somebody closing their car door next door? I see. Maybe they're leaving town because there's been an evacuation order and we didn't hear because we were watching the weather channel and it isn't local! They would broadcast it on all stations? Oh, okay. Are you sure?"

* whenever I read these two words, they always sound like a quote from what movie? twenty points for a correct answer.

Effluvia....

Hey there, One Blue Tree fans! I'm back! Sorry about the long absence. Went on an extended vacation to my ma's house, and didn't get a chance to blog. That doesn't mean I don't love you. All one of you. Seriously, does anyone read this but my husband? And my mother?

I have been cleaning up entirely too many bodily fluids recently. The boy has diarrhea, so every diaper is an adventure, and the dog decided to puke on the sofa today, so I am entirely fed up with the fact that our bodies have to produce liquid waste. Couldn't we just extrude hard pellets? Or maybe encapsulate our effluvia in egg-like capsules? What's with the hard to clean up semi-solid goo?

Okay, whatever readers I may have had are now entirely disgusted and leaving to find better, cleaner pastures. But wait! I have yet to update you on knitting news! Yes, there is knitting news. No, I have not finished the psycho baby blankie. But I did finish this!

One Buttonhole Bag, pattern courtesy of Mason Dixon Knitting. Knit in Burly Spun and Lamb's Pride Bulky, felted in my front loader, and totally satisfying. I need to make about twenty more.

Oh, and I bought the yarn here...

If you are ever within a couple hours drive (or plane ride. it's that good.) of Franklin Ohio, you have to go here. Yarn and Needle, on the river. Gorgeous inside and out. And with handy husband holding coffee shop! I wanted to live here. I live most of my knitting adventures through online purchases, so to actually be in a store with yarns I had previously seen only in dubiously colored photos on webpages was a thrill. Noro! Debbie Bliss! Berrocco! Everything Brown Sheep has to offer! I thought I'd died and gone to yarn heaven. And my hubbie had a good cup of coffee and time alone with his laptop, which is all he needs to be happy.

Oh, and that is the boy and his grandma in the photo, as well. I actually tried to teach my ma how to knit, which is an amusing exercise to say the least. This, the woman who has taken two different quilting classes and said about them, and I quote, "I might as well just throw all this fabric right in the trash." The woman who had a grubby, half-done cross stitch project, intended as part of a group effort, gently removed from her hands by concerned, well meaning friends who just wanted the damn thing done within the next decade. This woman. She asked me to teach her to knit so she could make a Buttonhole Bag, too.

And she's almost got it. Almost. She keeps taking the yarn the wrong way round the needle (blamed on her earlier crocheting, which makes sense) but other than that, no problem. I don't think she'll be knitting any sweaters any time soon, but the bag might just get finished.

Or I might be handed a grubby, gnarly, dropped stitch mess with a sigh of "I might as well have just thrown the yarn right in the trash." After which I will knit her the Buttonhole Bag myself. And she'll love it.

........

Can't think of a title. Hey! I finished the next square for the psycho squares blankie! It is currently awaiting sashing and mini block before pictures can be taken, so don't yell at me. I started the sixth and hopefully final block, which is basically going to be me winging it as I go along, since I don't really have much of a plan for it, other than keeping it the same color "flavor" as the other two white+dark blue blocks. I'm hoping it will look as cool as it does in my head. If it doesn't, too bad you can't see inside my head, 'cause it's AWESOME. Your loss.

Advertisers have sunk to new lows. I know, you didn't think that was possible. But lookee here:

That is a bunch of bananas. The sticker is not the Dole sticker, or Del Monte, or Chiquita. It is an ad for those ridiculous already prepared peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with no crusts. So, now, if a kid decides to put the sticker from the bananas on his or her forehead, bam, instant billboard. Have they no shame? The advertisers, not the children. Children definitely have no shame. It's what makes them so fun. At least the stickers used to be ads for fruit companies. But already prepared peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with no crusts? Come on. I mean, can you even say that without laughing? Try it. "Already prepared peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with no crusts." The ultimate in lazy slacker dinners has gone even slacker-ier. Or something.

Also, I spotted no less than three very obvious product placements in the third Austin Powers movie the other day. Two in the same scene. Someone walks into a room, sets down a bag of *named fast food* and a cup of *named soda brand*. Crazy.

All right, I will quit ranting about stupid crap. Now do you see why this post has no title?

Short update....

Here is the newest completed square relaxing with a hot beverage and "Polar Bear, Polar Bear, What Do You Hear?" I know, I know. You'd think such a sophisticated knitted objected would have a reading ability greater than preschool level. Believe me, I've tried to get him to branch out a little. But it was this or last summer's Knitty. Don't look at me like that! He only reads it for the articles.